ei BAD thoughts

i really shouldn't be thinking about you
i don't get it.. i try to keep myself busy
and most of the time, i am
but then the night time comes
and there's the hardest part of my day
its the time of the day i do NOT look forward to
it's because its when i get to be ALONE i become SAD.
i think. and think... and right now,
YOU are the only person in my head
people have told me this is wrong
you HURT me. you hurt me bad
you played with my heart
lied to me, fooled me, used me
we lived together, slept on the same bed
watched with the same TV,
ate at the same table,
showered in the same bathroom
we had everything going well
&one random night,
you told me WE SHOULDN'T BE TOGETHER
i laughed &assumed you were kidding
&i really wished you were
but then you told me you still think about her
that you still dream about her
that you weren't at all over her
&that YOU LOVE US BOTH
i couldn't believe what i was hearing
but i couldn't take anymore
so i didn't bother to listen
i got up &packed my things
everything we had ended
and i know this is WRONG
i should stop. stop thinking about you
but i can't. you're in my head
by the time i wake up,
&until that second i close my eyes to sleep
i lay down on my bed. stare at the ceiling
realize how LONELY MY LiFE iS
that even having my AMAZiNG FRiENDS
it's still you that i want. its always you
i wanna see you. i wanna hug you
i wanna talk to you. i wanna be where you are
the only thing is, YOU'VE GOT HER
&so you've erased me in your mind
&it hurts, yet here i am...
still waiting for you
thinking about you...
dreaming about you...
but i guess it's time to move on
it's definitely not easy at all
&i know it'll take time
but i'm ready...
&i know i got friends to help me =)